


Ease The Fire (That Within Me Burns)

by love_killed_the_superstar



Series: the debt of our time [5]
Category: W.I.T.C.H.
Genre: C.H.Y.K.N. Era, F/F, Gay Bar, Period Typical Attitudes, Pre-Canon, Underage Drinking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-13
Updated: 2017-09-13
Packaged: 2018-12-27 08:46:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,853
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12077640
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/love_killed_the_superstar/pseuds/love_killed_the_superstar
Summary: Kadma wasn't sure what to expect when Halinor promised her they'd get out on the scene if Kadma came to visit her at college. Of course, any chance to visit her secret girlfriend where people from Heatherfield wouldn't recognise her was good enough for Kadma, and she hastily pulled a sickie and packed her bags, told her parents she'd be staying with a college friend for a few days to work on a class project. It wasn't like it was completely false.(In October 1966, Kadma and Halinor visit a gay bar.)





	Ease The Fire (That Within Me Burns)

**Author's Note:**

> I know it probably seemed like I died for a while there, but trust me, I'm not through until Kadma and Halinor are acknowledged worldwide for the power couple they are.  
> On the plus side, I've been drawing them more lately, so that's cool. Check them out here: http://art-killed-the-superstar.tumblr.com/tagged/kalinor

Kadma wasn't sure what to expect when Halinor promised her they'd get out on the scene if Kadma came to visit her at college. Of course, any chance to visit her secret girlfriend where people from Heatherfield wouldn't recognise her was good enough for Kadma, and she hastily pulled a sickie and packed her bags, told her parents she'd be staying with a college friend for a few days to work on a class project. It wasn't like it was completely false.

The ride over to Halinor's college campus was about forty minutes by bus, and Kadma was relieved that it only took that long because she was itching to spend time with Halinor again. They hadn't been in contact as much after Halinor returned for the first semester of her second year – it had taken all summer to grieve Cassidy and Nerissa and the death of C.H.Y.K.N, as well as so many other things, and at one point Halinor had even considered dropping out of college and taking Kadma up on the Fadden Hills dream they'd talked about so many times, just without the degree and without the career plan in mind. Fortunately, she'd had a change of heart just a few days before enrolment, and had returned to campus with a steely mindset to see through the end of her education.

However, Halinor's telepathy was gone for the most part, meaning radio silence pretty much in terms of instant communication. There was always the occasional phone call, but Halinor always got nervous on the phone, so she'd started sending letters instead, letters Kadma would cherish and read over and over again and preserve in a small jade green suitcase under lock and key. These letters would present themselves in the forms of love poems, anecdotes of college life, existential questions about their place in the world, questions asking after Yanny, doubts and fears in regards to Kandrakar, the Oracle and Nerissa. Rarely would a letter come that failed to make her laugh out loud, blush profusely and well up in the space of two page sides. In a rare postcard that had been lost in the post, arrived a week late, was a proposition.

_K: Come visit me at college some time, I found just the right place for us to get out on the scene, if you know what I mean. See you soon, dear friend. -H_

Short and sweet, but totally not in Halinor's style – there wasn't so much as a planetary doodle in the creeping blank space at the bottom of the note. Normally she would cover at least two sides, but maybe she was trying to be mysterious. Either way, Kadma was taken for it, hook, line and sinker. Any excuse to spend time with Halinor would be one she'd be happy to take.

Halinor was already waiting at the bus station for her when she finally arrived, clad in a loose summer dress adorned with ratty string around the waist acting as a belt (which was already looking a little thin for late October), complimented by a frayed tan jacket with tassels that had to be around six inches long, and go go boots that matched the jacket. On anyone else, even Kadma would admit the outfit looked a complete mess. On Halinor, it strangely worked, even from an outsider's perspective. She had an uncanny ability to make any outfit presentable. She'd even make wearing a sack look good.

“Kadma!” She sprinted over (surprisingly fast for such high shoes) and wrapped her up in a tight hug. “How are you, dear friend? It's been ages! You're lucky I picked up on your thoughts when I did, you never sent a reply back to me!”

“I did, it just hasn't shown up yet,” Kadma pointed out, hugging her back. Halinor giggled into her shoulder.

“Anyway, at least this means my telepathy isn't completely gone. It might come in handy some day.”

Kadma wanted to ask, _what for? Cassidy is dead; Nerissa is sealed away on the other side of the world. Yan Lin's too far away for you to reach her – the power is useless. Not to mention an irritating reminder that the Oracle still has some sort of hold over us._

Instead, she shrugged. “Guess so.”

Halinor pulled away and tugged her hand, making no indication that she had picked up on that particular negative thought. “Shall we get going? The house I got isn't too far from the station, so we can walk. Also, don't even worry about my room mate. Ray's harmless, and he's passed out half the time. Works night shifts at a certain place we'll be visiting tonight, so he sleeps during the day.”

“And where will we be visiting, Hal? You haven't exactly given me a lot to go on,” Kadma pointed out, as Halinor began to steer the two of them towards the underpass leading out of the station. “All you sent me was a secretive little postcard.”

“You'll see,” sang Halinor playfully. “Did you bring something nice to dress up in?”

“Just my usual stuff,” said Kadma with a shrug. “Will that fly in your hippie club?”

“Sure. We don't shun people who prefer to dress more conservatively, you know. It's how you groove that matters.”

Kadma stared. “I don't groove, Hal. I barely dance.”

They broke free into sunshine and Halinor led her through the sunny residential area surrounding the station.

“I know that,” she said with a laugh. “Believe me, this club plays some great stuff. Besides, this is more than just going to a lame college discotheque – it's about the _scene_.”

“Again, secretive, secretive,” Kadma sighed, shaking her head. “What an unbelievable girl.”

“I'm being perfectly clear,” Halinor said with an equally mock-disappointed look. “You're the one not picking up on it.”

“Well, I guess I'll be totally surprised, then.”

True to Halinor's word, Ray was snoring away as Halinor let Kadma into her shared apartment. It was small without being too poky, and Halinor announced with a smile that although the rooms were paper-thin it 'wouldn't matter because Ray would be at his shift until dawn'. Reassuring. Halinor's room had a double bed, desk, and closet – just about everything she expected from a college dorm room, except in a separate apartment instead. Posters of Joe Cocker and The Four Tops were expertly pinned up against both closet doors, and their eyes seemed to watch her rather unnervingly wherever she walked. Instead, Kadma honed in on the desk.

Along with the assortment of textbooks and notepads neatly stacked up on her desk top was a framed photograph of the two of them with their graduation certificates, complete in caps and gowns, and sharing a bouquet of unidentifiable flowers (non-toxic Meridian lilies, freshly grown from seeds Kadma had collected on a past mission, but no one outside of their guardian circle needed to know that). She smiled as she traced the embossed frame reading 'best friends' along the bottom. Right. Friends.

Beside it was a group photograph, Nerissa included, which surprised Kadma given the way Halinor had shut down after her betrayal... but they all had different ways of moving on, she supposed. There was also a photograph of Cassidy framed, and it made Kadma's chest tighten.

“Well, here's my room. Make yourself at home.” Halinor straightened her already made bed and perched on it. She'd even tie-dyed her bedsheets, something Kadma knew Halinor's parents wouldn't be happy about if they knew. That said, they weren't happy about a lot of things going on in Halinor's life, and these days she didn't seem to care.

“Quite the place you've got here,” Kadma complimented. She sat down besides Halinor and grinned, before oh so subtly shutting the door without moving a muscle.

“You still have your telekinesis?” murmured Halinor, resting her head against her shoulder.

“About as much as you have your telepathy. It comes and goes.”

Halinor hummed.

“So how's Yanny doing?” she asked instead. “I don't write her very often. I know I probably should, but... I just don't know what to say. She was always closer to Nerissa than we were, so...”

“She doesn't talk to me much,” Kadma admitted. “But I mean, she dropped out of college after what happened, so she's busy working shifts. Sometimes we call. Sometimes I go to the Silver Dragon too, but it's not the same. The two of us have never really known what to say to each other.”

“It's so sad,” murmured Halinor. Kadma agreed. The death of Cassidy had also brought the death of their once inseparable friendship. Yan Lin hardly talked to them anymore, still doing the Oracle's bidding, no doubt. Nerissa was gone, Cassidy was gone. Kadma and Halinor only really had each other left. It would have been a comforting thought, if not for the circumstances.

“I'm tired of being sad,” Halinor continued, sounding defeated and feeble. “It hurt, and it still hurts, but I can't keep living like this, K. I need a _life._ The past is holding me back from that.”

“That's why you invited me out here, then?” Kadma guessed. She put an arm around Halinor, feeling a little awkward. “You wanted it to be like old times?”

“I guess.” Halinor peeked up at her with big eyes that Cassidy had once affectionately nicknamed 'Halinor's saucers'. The effect of which could make any human being melt, and Kadma in particular was prey to this and had no shame in admitting it. “I just want us to hang out. I found a great place, and I was so excited to tell you, but I thought, you know, maybe it was too soon. So I sent the postcard, half-hoping nothing would come of it. I just don't want you to think that I, that I don't care, because I _do,_ Kadma, I-”

“You don't have to explain it to me, Hal. I know.” She wasn't exaggerating; something about risking ostracising yourself from society to be with a person had a butterfly effect of complete trust and honesty, and Kadma amazed herself with things she knew about Halinor that nobody else could possibly know. It didn't help that before they had been removed from Kandrakar Halinor would often filter whispered thoughts into Kadma's head as she slept, like a broken dam in a stream, overflowing with thoughts. It was Kadma's favourite pastime, listening to Halinor's deeper mind flooding her mind. She missed hearing her voice.

_You can still hear it now, if only you'd ask,_ came Halinor's voice, gentle if not a little amused.

“Preying on a young woman's thoughts. What a cheap tactic to get me to admit how much I've missed this.” Kadma was smiling despite herself, and Halinor tugged her down so they were lying side by side on the bed.

“I'm a college girl now. College girls know how to get what they want.” Halinor's tone, seductive in the silliest way, made Kadma crack up, and Halinor had to shush her despite her own hushed giggles.

“Quiet, you'll wake Ray up,” she giggled, and silenced Kadma with a clumsy kiss that she was all too happy to fall into, even if she was still occasionally laughing into Halinor's closed smile.

“Frenching me now, are you? How bold.”

“Bold's my middle name,” Halinor grinned, peppering Kadma's cheeks and jaw with kisses.

“Well then, Halinor Bold Clarkson, what are our plans tonight? We've got the hard part out the way, so mind telling me what to expect?”

“So eager,” sighed Halinor, feigning disapproval. She tapped a finger against Kadma's chin. “All I'm saying is that we're going out, and there's going to be drinks, and there's going to be music. It's a great place Ray showed me. I've been so excited to take you out. You really want to ruin the fun?”

Kadma huffed and muttered, “No...”

“That's what I thought. We have another few hours, anyway, so lets just talk. How's college?”

“The usual. Still got Miriam Knickerbocker as my childcare project partner. Better than Paulie Tubbs, though. Can't get him off my back...”

 

…

 

They were ready.

Ray had left an hour earlier to prep for his bartender shift, leaving Halinor and Kadma to get showered and dressed ready for their night out. Kadma felt a little under dressed, even though she'd adopted a wardrobe more akin to mod fashion over the past few months, and had picked out a pair of slacks and a dark shirt with a white collar. When Halinor saw her she gave small applause.

“Nice look,” Halinor complimented with a grin. “A lot of the people who go to this club are copycat mods, so you'll fit right in.”

Halinor herself was dressed in a simple deep red mini dress patterned around the wide-set collar with pale yellow flowers, with her usual tasselled jacket thrown on and the go go boots from earlier, complimented by canary yellow seamless pantyhose. True hippie to the end.

“Ready to go?” she asked, taking Kadma's hand. Kadma swallowed and nodded.

As Halinor lead her out of the apartment block, she took Kadma around the back, through the parking lot and onto a back alley that seemed to go on forever, leading into one alley after another.

“Are you taking me to a crack house or something?” muttered Kadma. “Seriously-”

“Oh, patience,” chided Halinor. “We're nearly there.”

Finally a sign came into view, with the words _The Shrinking Violet_ reading in neon magenta. The windows were tinted, and the faint din of music could be heard leaking from the chimney. Outside, a few smokers were gathered, talking amongst themselves, all ages, races and genders mingling freely.

Kadma whistled.

“Oh, hush,” whispered Halinor with a grin. “I know it doesn't look like much. It's better on the inside, trust me.”

“I'll take your word for it,” Kadma sighed, allowing herself to be led across the street and into the bar. Inside was a different story entirely.

First was the drag queens. Kadma had never seen a real life drag queen before, though she figured there had to be some in Heatherfield, and they were even more theatrical up close. The queens were lip syncing to a Sandie Shaw song from a couple years back, their movements exaggerated. The air itself was thick with cigarette smoke (despite several signs in the establishment stating for smokers to go outside so they didn't have to crack open any windows), but they didn't so much as bat a fake eyelash.

Then came the people on the dance floor. Manicured nails met manicured nails. Steel-toed shoes met steel-toed shoes. There were the odd mismatch, but most came in pairs that danced the same, held themselves the same. Two girls danced cheek in cheek in the far corner, particularly lost in the song, and they caught Kadma's attention.

“You brought me to a queer bar?!” she gasped, turning to stare at Halinor in shock. “You – but – how did you even-?!”

“I know people,” defended Halinor, though more than anything she looked amused by Kadma's blatant shock. “Liberal arts college is wild, K. You wouldn't believe how _easy_ it is to find stuff like this out.”

“Wish community college was as exciting as all this. The most we have is a gay baseball star, and he's so well built everyone knows not to mess with him. It's infuriating. They say safety in numbers, but I'm too scared of getting decked to approach him!”

Halinor burst out laughing and couldn't contain her laughter as she steered Kadma towards the bar.

“Why thank you for your concern,” Kadma muttered dryly.

“Halinor!” Kadma and Halinor turned to the bartender, and Halinor grinned.

“Ray, hi! You look buzzed.”

“I was just talking to one of the queens, later they're gonna sync to The Supremes _,_ and you know that's gonna put a smile on my face.” Ray, with a dark complexion and wild-eyed curiosity, took in Kadma's appearance and the way that Halinor's hand was clasping hers, and his face split into a wide grin. “You're the one and only Kadma, right? Hallie's little girlfriend?”

Kadma felt her face redden and Halinor rolled her eyes. “Knock it off, Ray. What makes you think Kadma is my girlfriend?”

“Well, you're always talking about how tall your girl back home is,” he pointed out with an impish smile. “Seems pretty tall to me. You also told me she was cool and serious, and Kadma over here is definitely giving off those vibes. Not to mention you're holding hands.”

“Girls can hold hands without being queer, Ray,” retorted Halinor, though she was grinning. Kadma glanced around and from the looks of things, nobody else here was from Heatherfield. At least, there was definitely nobody else here who would know her. She took a deep breath.

“Actually, Ray, you're right. I _am_ Halinor's girlfriend. Now make us some cocktails.”

Halinor stared, then exploded into another infectious fit of giggles as Ray looked amazed she'd actually admitted it. Kadma held her chin high, willing herself not to let on how embarrassed she was right now.

“Yes, ma'am. Yikes. I can see which one of you wears the pants.”

“Ah, I love this place,” sighed Halinor, taking a seat at one of the bar stools. “Kadma admitted to someone that she's my girlfriend! How sweet is that!”

“Don't go shouting that to every new face you see,” retorted Kadma. “I'll deny it.”

“Fair enough.”

Kadma drank in the sight of the bar as Halinor began asking Ray about something or other relating to the rent. The queens had finished up their song and were taking a break, talking animatedly to a pair of men with gelled back hair and shirts almost entirely unbuttoned. A mod tune from an early 60s English band spilled out, lively with an irregular beat, and the slow dancing couples switched up their moves dramatically, trying in vain to keep in time with the ever changing beat. It was pretty amusing to watch.

Around the corners of the dance floor were a few scattered groups; men and women trying really hard not to look gay, clumped together like a support group, supposedly first-timers; women in men's shirts and loose slacks, smoking and talking amongst themselves; teddy boys with rolled up sleeves, bow ties and high pants, laughing and joking and singing along drunkenly; girls in heavy make-up and geometric patterned dresses, or baggy shirts and bell-bottoms, arguing over who was going to pay the tab; drag queens writing on the exposed skin of their adoring fans, blowing them kisses and striking exaggerated poses.

Kadma couldn't say she'd visited a bar before, but this was certainly not how she'd imagined them to be.

“Are all bars like this?” she wondered. “Or is it just everyone's drunkenness and queerness combined?”

“Hard to say,” Halinor giggled, sliding a cocktail towards Kadma. “But I've visited an ordinary bar before, and trust me, this place is much more entertaining.”

Kadma sipped and found it a little hard to believe this was an alcoholic beverage. Her brother Dev would occasionally slip her a beer and it tasted bitter, borderline vile, while this tasted like slightly bitter fruit juice.

“They call it a cosmopolitan,” Halinor explained with a smile. “It's a brand new cocktail. I reckon this is the first gay bar around to serve it!”

The sharpness reminded her of Halinor, quick and cutting when need be, but comfortingly so; a girl never afraid to speak her mind. It felt fitting to share this first drink with her.

One drink turned into three, and by that point Kadma felt a little dizzy with drink. _The Supremes_ were on, and the crowd whooped and cheered as three drag queens, mimicking the singers, stepped up onto the stage and blew exaggerated kisses at the audience.

Halinor grinned and blew them a kiss back, which the front queen mimed grabbing and putting down their cleavage.

“This is the best part of the night,” Halinor explained, grinning as wide as anything. “Trust me. You want to dance?”

“I... sure...”

Kadma couldn't remember the last time she and Halinor had danced together. Prom, maybe? A secret dance behind the bleachers, the faintest music accompanying them. Or some time in a secluded place. At a party in Metamoor's rebellion headquarters, folk music and happy laughter and people who didn't care if a couple was made up of two girls or otherwise. The memories were so faded in her mind. She never wanted them to disappear.

“ _It keeps me crying baby for you, keeps me sighing baby for you...”_

Kadma squeezed Halinor's hand in the darkness.

“I love you,” she murmured, as Halinor led her closer to the stage. The queen mimicking Diana Ross winked at them.

Halinor's expression softened, and she leaned over to give her a kiss on the cheek. Kadma's face began to heat up, and she glanced around nervously. Nobody had seen. Nobody cared, in a place like this.

“I love you too, K.”

Kadma's heart was racing, and she began to giggle, lacing her fingers between Halinor's. Halinor began to laugh too, and the two of them began to spin as the music picked up.

“No matter what you do or say, I'm gonna love you anyway...”

Kadma leaned forward and tentatively, secretly, their lips met as the crowd erupted into cheers – the queens were swaying their hips to the beat of the music and throwing their heads back, reining in the applause. Nobody noticed two young lesbians in the heat of the moment, and for that, Kadma found herself grateful.

 

…

 

“The plan was,” Halinor giggled as they staggered back towards her apartment, “t-to loosen up together at the bar, and to propose we have some good old free love afterwards! But, I didn't think we'd get so blitzed!”

Kadma almost tripped over her own feet, both from the drink and from what Halinor had just suggested.

“S-Sex! Halinor Clarkson, that's – I know we talked about it before, b-but – stars, Hal, that's something we gotta plan together!”

“I know...” She giggled again, shaking her head, and clumsily unlocked the front door. Kadma all but planted face first into Halinor's bed.

“I'm sleepy...”

“I didn't realise you'd be such a lightweight,” laughed Halinor. “That's fine, I guess. We have the next few days to talk, before you have to go back.”

Kadma mumbled something incoherently into Halinor's pillow, and after kicking off her shoes, Halinor flopped down onto the bed beside her.

“What was that, K?”

“Mm... love you...”

Kadma's eyes were beginning to close, no matter how she fought to get another glimpse of Halinor's flushed cheeks and heavy eyes before the night was over. She saw her lips pull into a smile, and felt them plant against her cheek as she drifted in and out of sleep.

“Goodnight, my dear.”

Kadma felt Halinor pull a blanket over the both of them, and the last thing that registered in her mind was the feeling of Halinor's hand resting atop hers.

She slept soundly for the first night in months.

 

**Author's Note:**

> Next up: Yan Lin's wedding.  
> Feel free to leave a comment? Seriously it doesn't even need to be a review I just love talking about kalinor with ppl


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